Literary Contest Where Ogden Nash Wrote

The Portsmouth Antheneum will launch a literary version of 'American Idol' on as part of the upcoming Portsmouth Literary Festival. Writers will read their best short fiction before a live audience and judges. The Festival, now in it's 20th year, runs from October 23rd - 24th.

Legend has it that Ogden Nash would seek out its cozy nooks to write during his summer's there. In 1962 Nash extended his residency to 6 months out of the year when he purchased an Atlantic Avenue home big enough for his daughters and their families.

Not that Nash necessarily needed a quiet oasis to write his humor. Visitors to his Little Boar's Head home were surprised to see that Nash was comfortable versifying for publication in the midst of chaotic child's play!

Ogden Nash and the '69 Mets

I remember New York City in the summer of 1969 as an electric time. Neil Armstrong touched moon dirt on July 25th. In mid-August, Up the Thruway in the Catskills, there was a revolutionary music festival at Yasgur's farm.

Six weeks later, the Mets won the Eastern division after being in last place for much of the first half of the year.

Bypassing Woodstock & Apollo 13, Ogden Nash chose to memorialize the 'Amazin's. Nash, like many New Yorker's viewed the Mets as the National League successors to the turncoat Giants and Dodgers. Upon learning of their victory Nash penned the following thank you to Joan Payson, the Mets owner, and sent it to the New York Times.

A Poem

Whence camest thou, Mrs. Payson, dear?
Out of nowhere into the here.
At last thy patient, loyal clients
Can forget the Dodgers and the Giants.
Then what about O'Malley and Stoneham?
De mortius nihil nisi bonum.

Ogden Nash September 24, 1969

As a fan of both the Orioles and the Mets, Nash must have enjoyed the ensuing World Series immensely.

In a 1957 New Yorker poem, Nash expressed the following about the Giants moving to San Francisco:

Lines to be Carved on Coogan's Bluff

The candle's out, the game is up;
Who has heart for a stirrup cup?
Farewell Giants and Horace Stoneham
De mortius nihil nisi bonum.

Preparing for Flu Season with Ogden Nash

Nash persevered with his writing and lecturing despite many stomach related health issues throughout his career. By lampooning the challenges and foibles of every day life, Nash made them easier to face. The Germ, was quoted this week by Eleanor from Malaysia in her blog:

The Germ

A mighty creature is the germ

Though smaller than the pachyderm

His customary dwelling place

Is deep within the human race

His childish pride he often pleases

By giving people strange diseases

Do you, my poppet, feel infirm?

You probably contain a germ.

Ogden Nash Says Thonx to the Bronx

Geographical Reflection from Hard Lines in 1931 is oft quoted.

Lesser known is the 1964 story featuring Nash from the New York Times:

Contrite Poet Gives A Cheer for Bronx On Golden Jubilee

Give the Bronx their due,
Say the poet, with rue.

That was more or less the posture assumed yesterday by Ogden Nash.

Back in 1931, Mr. Nash recalled, a "line popped into my head for no reason." It was bought by The New Yorker, which penetrates to New York's northernmost borough, where some residents were consternated by the couplet:

The Bronx?
No Thonx.

The lines lingered on the fringes of Bronx lore for many years. Dr. Abraham Tauber, dean of the faculty at the Bronx Community College, remembered it recently.

Dean Tauber is a Bronx booster. He wants the borough's golden jubilee, currently being celebrated, to be a success. The Community College, a unit of the City University of New York, will even offer a course next fall in the history of the Bronx.

The dean wrote Mr, Nash, recalling the couplet, and asked if the poet would not "consider writing a little piece in your inimitable style, not to make amends but to help us smile over our own foibles and yet to walk, with head held high and quickened step, the streets in the place in which so many fine people live and work and play."

Back came this reply from Mr. Nash:

Dear Dean Tauber,
I can't seem to escape the
sins of my smart-alec youth;
Here are my amends.

I wrote those lines, "The Bronx?
No thonx";
I shudder to confess them.

Now I'm an older, wiser man
I cry, "The Bronx? God bless
them!"

Contritely yours,
Ogden Nash.

- New York Times, May 25, 1964

As excerpted from If Fun is Fun, isn't that Enough? Nash sought to educate audiences to what extent a poet's license could go in generating smiles:

"They'll sell their birthright every time.
To make a point or turn a rhyme.
This motto, child, is my bequest:
There's many a false word spoken in jest."

'Carnival' at the Met 9/26

Philippe de Montebello, head of NY's Metropolitan Museum of Art, will be reading Ogden Nash's poems in a staging of 'Carnival of the Animals'. The Orpheus Chamber Orchestra will provide the musical accompaniment.

One little known Ogden Nash animal poem that won't be included:

Pastoral

Two Cows
Mildly Mooing;
No Bull;
Nothing doing

Scroobious Pip

One of Ogden Nash's lesser known collaborations was the completion of "Scroobious Pip", by Edward Lear, the infamous 'nonsense' humorist of Victorian England. Lear's handwritten manuscript for Scroobius was found after he died in 1888. It was published in the U.S. in 1953, with unfinished verses. In 1968, Nash took up the task to complete what has been called one of Lear's most engaging poems. The Pip is a strange, inscrutable creature - part bird, beast, insect, and fish. Nash filled in the missing lines and phrases to complete the tale of why all the animals in the world gathered around the Scroobius Pip.

The main character is also the namesake of a UK based Hip Hop / Jazz / a'cappella artist

The Scroobious Pip

The Scroobious Pip went out one day
When the grass was green, and the sky was grey.
Then all the beasts in the world came round
When the Scroobious Pip sat down on the ground.
The cat and the dog and the kangaroo
The sheep and the cow and the guineapig too--
The wolf he howled, the horse he neighed
The little pig squeaked and the donkey brayed,
And when the lion began to roar
There never was heard such a noise before.
And every beast he stood on the tip
Of his toes to look a the Scroobious Pip.
At last they said to the Fox - "By far,
You're the wisest beast! You know you are!
Go close to Scroobious Pip and say,
Tell us all about yourself we pray-
For as yet we can't make out in the least
If you're Fish or Insect, or Bird or Beast."
The Scroobious Pip looked vaguelyy round
And sang these words with a rumbling sound-
Chippetty Flip; Flippetty Chip;-
My only name is the Scroobious Pip.

2

The Scroobious Pip from the top of a tree
Saw the distant Jellybolee,-
And all the birds in the world came there,
Flying in crowds all through the air.
The Vulture and Eagle, the cock and the hen
The Ostrich the Turkey the Snipe and the Wren;
The Parrot chattered, the Blackbird sung
And the owl looked wise bu held his tongue,
And when the Peacock began to scream
The hullabaloo was quite extreme.
And every bird he fluttered the tip
Of his wing as he stared at the Scroobious Pip.
At last they said to the owl- "By far,
You're the wisest Bird -- you know you are!
Fly close to the Scroobious Pip and say,
Explain all about yourself we paray-
For as yet we have neither seen nor heard
If you're fish or insect, beast or bird!"
The Scroobious Pip looked gaily round
And sang these words with a chirpy sound-
Chippetty Flip; Flippetty Chip;-
My only name is the Scroobious Pip.

3

The Scroobious Pip went into the sea
By the beautiful shore of Jellybolee-
All the fish in the world swam round
With a splashing squashy spluttering sound.
The sprat, the herring, the turbot too
The shark, the sole and the mackerel blue,
The flounder spluttered, the purpoise puffed
...............................................................
And when the whale began to spout
...............................................................
And every fish he shook the tip
Of his tail as he gazed on the Scroobious Pip
At last they said to the whale- "By far
You're the biggest Fish - you know you are!
Swim close to the Scroobious Pip and say-
Tell us all about yourself we pray!-
For to know you yourself is our only wish;
Are you beast or insect, bird or fish?"
The Scroobious Pip looked softly round
And sung these words with a liquid sound-
Pliffity Flip; Pliffety Flip;-
My only name is the Scroobious Pip.

4

The scroobious Pip sat under a tree
By the silent shores of the Jellybolee;
All the insects in all the world
About the Scroobious Pip entwirled.
Beetles and with purple eyes
Gnats and buzztilential flies-
Grasshoppers, butterflies, spiders too,
Wasps and bees and dragon-flies blue,
And when the gnats began to hum
bounced like a dismal drum,
And every insect curled the tip
Of his snout, and looked a the Scroobious Pip.
At last the said to the Ant - "By far
You're the wisest insect, you know you are!
Creep close to the Scroobious Pip and say-
Tell us all about yourself we pray,
For we can't find out, and we can't tell why-
If you're beast or fish or a bird or a fly."
The Scroobious Pip turned quickly round
And sang these words with a whistly sound
Wizzeby wip - wizzeby wip--
My only name is the Scroobious Pip.

5

Then all the beasts that walk on the ground
Danced in a circle round and round-
And all the birds that fly in the air
Flew round and round in a circle there,
And all the fish in the Jellybolee
Swum in a circle about the sea,
And all the insects that creep or go
Buzzed in a circle to and fro.
And they roared and sang and whistled and cried
Till the noise was heard from side to side-
Chippetty tip! Chippetty tip!
It's only name is the Scroobious Pip.

The Quote Industry

Quoteopia!

There is a cottage cluster of web sites focused on quoting famous lines and sage advice, where Nash's verse fits well and can be found in abundance. Type in "ogden nash breadlines headlines" to your favorite search engine and dozens of virtual quote repositories pop up. These are great if you need to find a witty Nashism in a jiffy. (What would make them even better would be if they were able to attribute the work and the year) One gentleman's blog, The Cynics Almanac , in honor of Nash's birthday, cited the entire verse as follows:

They take a paper and they read the headlines,
So they've heard of unemployment and they've heard of breadlines,
And they philanthropically cure them all
By getting up a costume charity ball.

This blog also notes that Dorothy Parker's birthday occurs on 8/22. Which interestingly enough, is three days after Nash's. (Nash 1902, Parker, 1893) Parker and Nash were friends and greatly admired each others work.